ROOMMATE SLEEPOVER ETIQUETTE
Living with roommate is, in a sense, one big continuous sleepover. While you may sleep in different rooms, you will often share similar bedtime routines, including watching television together, eating dinner together, cleaning the pantry and kitchen and getting ready for bed. If you are having someone spend the night at your place, then it is a good idea to run over the standard roommate sleepover rules. That way you are not stepping on your roommate’s toes and avoiding any awkward or angry feelings towards both you and your house guest.
Common Sleepover Sense
If you are having someone sleepover, it is a good idea to run this by your other roommates, especially if the guest is planning on staying for more than one night. If, for example, your best friend from out of town is crashing on your couch for the weekend, this should be a decision that your roommate is well aware of. If you know that your roommate has a big exam to study for during that same weekend or needs to get some sleep, then try to stay out of the house as much as possible and keep quiet out of respect.
Give your house guest a run down of the house rules. Perhaps you take your shoes off before entering the house; perhaps you limit smoking to one area of the balcony; perhaps you always eat dinner together as part of your evening ritual. Let your house guest know so that he/she feels comfortable in your home and so that your roommate doesn’t have to get angry.
If you are having a number of people sleep over, say, after a party you have thrown or after attending a bar down the street from your apartment, then, again, you should discuss this with your roommate. Explain to your roommate the situation and let her know this isn’t going to happen all the time. Make sure your roommate can do the things she needs to do in the morning without being disturbed by sleeping bodies. For example, try to keep your sleepovers limited to your bedroom, rather than letting your mates crash on the couch, on the kitchen floor and in the bathtub. This can be a recipe for disaster and a heated argument the next morning when your already-late-for-work roommate is trying to take a shower.
Relationship Sleepovers and Roommates
If you are having your boyfriend or girlfriend sleep over, then you may not need to run this by your roommate as this is probably a pretty common occurrence if you have been dating for a while. However, you should respect that your boyfriend/girlfriend doesn’t live in the house and doesn’t pay the rent and thus shouldn’t spend too much time there. Many roommates will get angry if your significant other is constantly sleeping over and using the common living space, especially if you are not around. Try to limit sleepovers to once or twice a week and spend some time at your partner’s house as well. Talk to your roommate about how he/she feels about the situation. Many roommates find this behavior annoying but are too timid to say anything about it.
Having a friend sleepover is your right as a tenant; however, if you have a roommate or roommates, then you need to respect their privacy and their rights as well. While you may not have to go to bed at a certain time anymore, you still need to keep practice decency and respect. Keep noises to a minimum, respect your roommates’ privacy and follow the house rules that are in practice.